


Excoriation

by skysedge



Series: Downloading Desire... [1]
Category: SINoALICE (Video Game)
Genre: Blood and Injury, Canon-Typical Violence, Drabble, F/F, Gen, Self-Esteem Issues, Self-Harm
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-09
Updated: 2020-10-09
Packaged: 2021-03-08 00:06:49
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 472
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26916331
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/skysedge/pseuds/skysedge
Summary: In truth she’s furious with herself. For being hopeful. For allowing herself to be weak for even a moment. When she had first seen Snow there had been a fluttering light in her chest, just for an instant. Hope that there was still something beautiful here. Something good. Something true.
Relationships: Alice/Snow White (SINoALICE)
Series: Downloading Desire... [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2027903
Comments: 5
Kudos: 11
Collections: femslashficlets: folktale trope challenge





	Excoriation

“I’m okay.”

Alice sits with her back to a dusty bookcase, a smile on her pink lips, and picks at the fresh scabs on her pale thigh. 

“I’m okay.”

Blood seeps out around her fingers, working under her nails, and still she picks and pulls at her damaged skin, the pain blossoming through her whole body like liquid fire. It burns and spreads with delightful intensity, anchoring her in the here and now.

But where is here and now? She doesn’t know. No, she doesn’t care. It doesn’t matter. The only thing that matters is her mission. She has to fight. She has to kill. She can’t let anything stand in her way.

She tears at the edges of the cut until it grows, gasping with the sharpness of the sensation.

“I’m...okay...”

Focus. No distractions. No wasting time. She’s done enough of that already. She can almost still hear the echoing of heels on these rotting wooden floors, a soft whispering voice edged with steel. That’s sign enough that she needs to focus, to cling onto her sanity. She should forget all about that girl. She had never asked to find another person here anyway.

“I’m _okay_.”

In truth she’s furious with herself. For being hopeful. For allowing herself to be weak for even a moment. When she had first seen Snow there had been a fluttering light in her chest, just for an instant. Hope that there was still something beautiful here. Something good. Something true. She had hidden that hope behind harsh words and a blank expression, guarded it deep within her black little heart and crushed it down until she couldn’t hear it anymore. 

It had been for the best. Snow’s justice is incompatible with her own desire. Even that tiny shred of hope has done nothing her bring her pain.

She raises her fingers to her eyes, watches the way her blood runs down them, the way it glistens in the candlelight. She thinks of how well blood suited Snow, scarlet against her white skin and delicate dress, bold and fierce as the light in her eyes. Snow is both cold and hot at once, her voice meek but her battle style visceral. 

She’s beautiful. The sort of beauty that’s unobtainable for someone as dark and sullied as Alice herself.

“ _I’m. Okay._ ”

Best to forget about her completely. Alice reaches for her sword. Her fingers are wet with blood and slip on the hilt. She tightens her grip, stabs the sword into the creaking wood beneath her and uses it to get to her feet. She breathes in deep and exhales slowly.

“I'm okay,” she says again as if saying it makes it true. “It’s time to go.”

And so she sets off between the bookshelves alone, that tiny hope in her heart withering away to dust.

**Author's Note:**

> Just finished their first crossover chapter and vomited up some thoughts o/


End file.
